this is fun

from myspace, funny: "every time that i see one of these surveys, it is always dumb. it is the same set of questions every time. but not this one! give it a try...

Go to www. urbandictionary. com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the FIRST definition it gives you.



here goes:


1) Your name?: stephen

"1. Greek in origin, I've come to the conclusion that Stephen is just about the coolest male name. Whether it's prnounced 'Stef-an' or 'Steve-en' doesn't matter, it's just awesome.
Steph and Stevie are also the coolest nicknames.
Some famous Stephens include Stephen King, Stephen Fry, and Stephen Hawking.

Stephen is an awesome name. "

HAHAH!!

"2.
a guy who needs to learn when they are liked by a girl and should ask them out "

ummm... fate, are you trying to tell me something? there IS a girl i should ask out, but I'm far too much of a sissy.

2) Your age?: 29

"1. 29 is akin to, in the words of most, "Humping a Humpback whale"

The 2 from sideways looks like a whale's hump and tail, hence the whale part, and the 9 is you. 29 resembles you humping a whale. It is a strange new thing that is catching on rapidly.
"I got number 29." Grant said.

"Oh silly," I said, "Don't you know that means? It means you humped a humpback whale."

qua? nani? huuh?

"3. 29 centimeters. The traditional length of a balisong (butterfly knife). Approxiamatly 11.4 inches, of which the blade makes up for about 5 inches and the handle the rest.
I have numerous cuts on my hands from playing with my 29. "

awesome. you probably don't know this about me, but I used to collect butterfly knives. I'm really good with one. honestly. really fucking good. Rodney once gave me his because he was afraid that he was going to kill himself with it. I still have that butterfly knife. I'll never forget rodney.

3) One of your friends?: kevin

"1.
Anglicized form of the Irish name Caoimhín, derived from the older Irish Coemgen, composed of the Old Irish elements coem "kind, gentle, handsome" and gein "birth". Saint Caoimhin established a monastery in Ireland and is the patron saint of Dublin.
Kevin and I are going to the park."

Kevin IS kind, gentle, and handsome! scarey!

"2.
v. The act of hip-thrusting. The body is positioned in such a manner in which the movement of the pelvic muscles is maximized whereas the movement of the rest of the body is minimized. The hips are then thrusted back and forth in rapid succession. See HardGay.
After winning the epic warcraft match, Daniel kevined his monitor."

huh? awesome. i hope you're reading this kevin

"3.
A Portuguese slang for penis
"Woah thats a big kevin"

god i love my Portuguese roots.

4) What should you be doing?: working

"
a form of the word work, to perform duties or labor, (sometimes used as opposite of broken, or as synonym for functioning*) "

boring but accurate. go check out "sleeping" my second option. it's... ummm.. embarrassing.

5) Favorite Food?: dunno. i'll go with pizza

"1.

The perfect meal--an open-faced pie using tomato sauce, cheese, and any manner of meat toppings. In addition to the standard, medium-thick-crust pizza, there are two major American varieties: New York style, also called thin crust; and Chicago style, also called 'deep-dish' or (more accurately) 'stuffed' pizza.

Pizza is the perfect meal, man. A slice for lunch, a whole pie for dinner, and cold pizza for breakfast--hallalujah"

meh.

6) Hometown?: Chagrin falls

"

A small, midwest town of several thousand located south east of the Cleveland Metropolis. Originally an old miner town, this historically upper-middle class town has become a minor center of commerce- its many stores along Washington Street include boutiques, restaurants, and gift shops. Its youth, who attend Chagrin Falls Exempted High School are known for their juvenile tendencies that include but are not limited to: stealing, trespassing, and underage consumption. These problems are minor, compared to the fact that the school ranks consistantly in the top 100 public schools in America- giving notion to the fact that the town's students have prematurely developed a degree of maturation, as evidenced by the balance of academic and social aspects practiced. This balance manifests in the school's alumni base, which encompasses many of the most successful persons in Cleveland and abroad. It's student athletes are referred to as Tigers, and the high school consists of many middle of the road, average sized teams.

1. My family is considering watching the Blossom Parade in Chagrin Falls.

2. The Chagrin Falls students stole my pumpkins for the third time this year!

3. I'm bored, I'm driving over to Chagrin Falls to party.

4. Students from Chagrin Falls are well prepared for the real world due to their academic and social tendencies.

5. Chagrin Falls has won the Chagrin Valley Conference many times."

AWWWW SHIT!!! lets see what Cleveland has to say.

"2. We have rappers like Fat Al and Chip Da Ripper
We're poor as fuck
We got lots of sports teams most of witch suck but Cavs are comin' up and we're all waitin fo r a Indians season
Our lake, Eire, has cought on fire not once but three times
It snows on easter and not christmas
You got more drugs in our suburbs then in Colmubus
Rock started here and since then its been dry here"

HA!! DNA Level C is my favorite cleveland name. lets see what columbus has.

"7. The act of stealing for one's personal use, to gank something which is not yours. Roots of this word come from Christopher Columbus' expedition to the Americas where he consequently stole land from the American Indians.

Ted: Where'd you get all of these CD's?
Ron: Man, you know I went Columbus on the video store and took all of them."

ha! i'm going to start using that.

7) Middle name: MANUEL (BITOCH!!!! I miss vovo).

"1.

Originally coming from Hebrew, as most of the names finished in -EL (God). Manuel means "God is with us".

Very common in Spanish-speaking countries, but also in other countries in a similar form (e.g. Emmanuel in Italy).

Manuel es un gran amigo mio

Translation: Manuel is a good friend of mine"

I've seriously been thinking about going as manuel. who's with me?

"2. in guatemala, a "manuel" is similar to saying a tight ass or a stingy person. So pretty much is someone who doesnt like to spend a lot of money and thinks everything is expensive. They want discounts on everything.

Why are you charging me gas money to take me 5 blocks over. Stop being such a manuel."

Ummm... that's not so nice

8) Car you drive?: Mini cooper

"

A person of the female persuasion who is much smaller physically, much like how the minicooper car is much cmaller compared to other automobiles. This small size of the female compared to the male makes for very exciting possiblities during sexual intercourse because of the ease with which the female could be manipulated. The mini cooper S is much the same but for perhaps a smaller size and more attractive than the normal version.

Eva Longoria, 5'2"
Eva Longoria is a mini cooper"

huh...... who'dathunk it... i need help with my lingo, apparently.

9) Last person you talked to on the phone? (it was actually kevin, but he already got a spot, so im going with someone else. ) Kathryn

"1.

Quiet, but crazy, a little bit spaztic, and a whole lot of amazing.

J: "I love Kathryn, she may be a spazo, but she's fantastic.""

yep.. that's pretty true.

"2.

pretty amazing girl who can shake that booty at any time at any place.

woah, that girl on the bar top...yeah, she's doing the kathryn"

I hope you're reading this, kathryn

10) Your last name? wolfson

" A sorry excuse for a dean"

ouch! damn, what did i do to him?

further musings

I've been thinking about myself alot recently. I suppose I do that often, but hey... that's what I do. And so recently I've been thinking about where i am and who I am at this point in my life.

Cleaning up my apartment today made me think today about possessions. I've decided that I want to have less possessions rather than more. I really don't own very much...I have almost no furniture, but it is still hard to collect everything, pack everything, and move everything. And it makes me not want to move. Ever. and that saddens me. It's no secret to anyone who knows me that I'm disappointed that I've never really traveled or lived anywhere other than Ohio. It's not that I have anything wrong with Ohio, really, its that I feel like I need to be out. I feel sheltered. I feel inexperienced. I feel like there is so much that I need to see...that i need to learn, and I just haven't been able to yet. But there are so many things that tie us down to one place. Possessions are at the top of the list. I don't want to move, because I don't want to haul my bed across the world. I don't want to abandon my computer. I love my movies. What's more, my current profession (or, not really) ties you down to one place. You take the bar somewhere and you stay there, unless you are willing to take it again... and why woudl any one do that. Besides, you're building your future at whatever firm you're at. Do youreally want to give up the partnership track? Now, I get that. security is nice. a real, professional life is nice. and sure, if i had a real job, i may feel differently...but i still hate that your work and your possessions tie you down to one place. as far as im concerned, the only thing good enough to tie you down to one place is family.

speaking of family, it was my grandparent's 60th anniversary this weekend. And once again, I got very melancholy about age. Not only do i feel old myself, but I looked at my family and just got very scared. Where did the time go? Where has my life gone? Time is cruel. Life is cruel. my mind is cruel.

I feel like I'm always waiting for things to happen. I say that a lot, but its always true. I have such trouble acting on things that I want.... i get performance anxiety... fear of failure. whatever.

I've also felt very lonely recently. I go thru these phases where I'll feel lonely and then I don't and then I do. well, right now, I feel pretty lonely. I have friends, but I don't spend enough time with the people i really like. Take, for example, Phil and Andy. I like them both, but on relatively superficial levels. when I leave Ohio, I'll think of them, but in a curious sort of way, rather than a sad sort of way. Like people you graduated high school with, and hung out with from time to time, but didn't really see much until your reunion. Contrast that with someone like Sara or Marta... old friends, lost thru time, still acquaintances, but still friends from another life. Bob Baskette...

I really should just move. I should start a new life somewhere. But I'm so scared... I'm scared of failing. so scared. crippled with fear. scared of leaving the friends i have here. scared of not making new ones.

When I was in high school, i ran with a very tight group. I'd say that we all geniunly cared about each other. Zack used to say we were a family... I think that was true...for about 4 years. Sadly, there was a schism... and the family is gone now. And i think I came out worst in the split. Because I relied on having that family. Sara has Joe. Marta has had several people, now Nigel. Zach has Margaret. Lowell has his life... Adam has his. me.. I feel like I life ended for me. and I haven't recovered. it sounds lame to say that I'm still affected by things that happened 5 years ago... but i can't help it. I feel like if I died in my apartment, no one who isn't my blood family would even think to check on me.

i've also had trouble getting used to how people as we get older don't like to just hang out together. again, back in the old life, we would just get together, drink coffee. read, chat, watch tv, whatever. Now, everything has to revolve around an activity. thing is, i think the most important times with friends are those times just hanging out. just sitting, chatting, reading, watching tv...whatever.

what's wrong with me? I've been really depressed, i've been lonely, I've been harboring a crush like a 15-year old girl. I've been totally unfocused. i've been tired. sigh.

any of you who are reading this... i apologize for being so down. I don't know what's wrong with me. and you all are people who i care for greatly... and I apologize if i just run away someday. And I apologize for the boringness of this post.

musings

So... It's no secret, but I've been super depressed for a while now. Actually, I've been depressed for 10 years now, but in particular, this past year has been very hard on me. And I've been thinking about it. a lot. How do i fix this? The last time I was this depressed, it was because of Marta. well, more accurately, it was because of my dependence on Marta, and then not getting over her. So, a cure was pretty clear: get over her/get a new girl. I did get over her (eventually) but not because of a new girl. I just decided that she was no longer something i needed. and i was happier. At least, I wasn't depressed about the break up any longer. Now, tho... the cure seems much tuffer to me. I know the problem. but it's multi-part. I have no direction. No job. huge debt. and I'm getting old. I feel lonely a lot. And I have no idea how to get out of this funk. I could find direction...but i can't seem to find any direction. I don't qualify for any jobs that sound interesting. I don't even really know what i want. or what i want at all.

When I left law school the first time, I left because I was scared that i was going to get out with no job, and a huge debt hole that was so large I had to take a job i hated just to pay my way out. Now, i'm afraid that was true. People say to me "you can find A job..." but I don't want "A" job. because I know I'll leave it within 2 years. I need to do something that i actually care about. but what do i care about? I like riding my bike. I care about my family. I like to read. I like to watch movies. I like to listen to CDs. that's about it.

I honestly think I would be happiest if i could just live a super simple life. i'm so confused. lesigh.

holy fucking shit

if i ever go to india, i am most definitely not driving. anywhere. at all.