I've been looking so long at these pictures of you, that I almost believe that their real

I take blurry photos. Well, not every photo I take is blurry, but I've realized that the ones I like best are almost always blurry, often underexposed (not overexposed, tho I have some of those too), I'm fond of natural lighting (I almost never use a flash), I like when the subject is not in the center of the frame, and some of my favorite pictures have not focused on faces. Instead, the subject tends to be looking away, or the face is not in focus, or something.

I've tried to figure out what it is about these kinds of photos that I love so much. part is surely because I think it looks vaguely arty. As Andrew makes fun of me, they're my Doughty pictures, because Mike Doughty has a way of taking blurry photos. But also, i often say that I think they are more like memories than other photos. They are blurry, unclear, but evocative of the time and place. And they are detached from reality, just a bit.

I really need to get to work, but I've been thinking about something someone said to me the other day. That sometimes you want to remember something, and a photograph is not quite right. I understand that. I really do. somethings are so personal, that you want to be able to relive the moment in your mind. You don't want an artifical representation of it. It's yours and yours alone. And certainly there are times like that. But I'm a bit conflicted. Because I have never, not once, said, I wish I had less photos. Instead, I think back to my time at Oberlin. The time when I can't remember anything. And I think, I really wish I had at least a few pictures from Keep. Maybe I could put names to the faces that ocassionally pop into my head. Maybe I would remember more than the ocassional flash, triggered by nothing, that hits me without notice. Maybe.

One thing I do not like is photoshop. Sure, its fun, but I have these issues with things like my Uncle Dan does, editing out people, editing in grass, etc. etc. because that is substituting your real memory for false memories. Sure, the picutre looks good, but at what cost? I think this goes back to what nooree said...sometimes you want to remember, not have a picture. And in that way, with the photoshop, your changing your memories. That, i do not like.

Ok, back to property. ugh. I really want to not.