All hail phil, the woodchuck

Apparently Phil the Groundhog saw his shadow today which means 6 more weeks of cold and grey. I could have told you that.

I posed the question today whether people in California understand the movie Groundhog day. And indeed, did it do any money across the world? Because it seems like such a quaint, small town, old America thing, that I can imagine other people who see it would approach the movie with a "huh?" I mean, looking at teh town of punxsutawney reminds me of chardon or munson or hudson or any of the other 1000 tiny towns aroudn here...i wonder if anyone else can relate in the same way..

that being said, I think the movie is actually, genuinely, quite good. not just because its hysterically funny, but also because it makes me think of what i'd do if i had ot relive the same day over and over for years. I think it's interesting that he goes insane for a while... because I think that would have to happen. Then the movie poses the question of why he's stuck in the Mobius stip of groundhog days. And it boils down to 2 things: 1. improving his own life, and 2. getting Andie Macdowell to like him. So, then is it really a movie about Karma? Well, maybe... but i think its more a movie about getting the chance to really figure out what's important in life, but not wasting years and years doing it. Because it took Bill murray in that movie literally years to escape the loop. but for his body, it was only a day. and he figured out what was important. And he stopped being an ass. And he moved on. The rest of us spend years, even our whole lifes, searchign for the same. Trying to find out what's important. trying to get the girl. trying to get people to like us, briefly going insane. But we spend lifetimes failing and getting back up again. If only I could learn it all in one day.

I think its interesting too because Bill Murray was able to go back and actually fix his mistakes. how much would i give for that? and how much would i give to know the right thing to say, ever. I never ever know the right thing to say.

Perhaps there is a real, honest lesson to be learned from groundhog day. Perhaps I am stuck in a loop. Sure. of course i am. the question is, how do i get out? Dont be an ass and find my andie macdowel? who knows?

Days studying for the bar are odd. I work and work but dont really feel like im going anywhere with it. whatever. focus hurts right now. i need to get over this little bit of burn out



Bill Murray deserved an oscar for Rushmore. Its a great performance. For some reason, I've always loved the line that ends this scene. "She's my Rushmore, Max." "Yea, she was mine, too." That thing that drives you beyond your better judgement? Drives you to act crazy, unlike yourself, just for the chance to obtain it? But the truth is, you may never get it? Is Rushmore that unattanible level of achievement? That brass ring that is always just out of reach? Do we all have 'Rushmores?' I think I have many? I think I only reach for things I can't get... maybe. I dont know.