there you are. do i know you? no, but you're there

Im at panera's trying to do work and failing miserably. Its bad. So instead, I'm reflecting a minute n things. Coming back to columbus is always a little bit weird, i think mainly because I spend time with people. I'm so isolated when at home, that its odd for me (and i wish it weren't) to see my friends again. It reminds me that I have a life of my own outside of cleveland. Its not that I dont like cleveland...far from it...its home and it will forever have that familiar feeling of being 'home.' but being here reminds me that i have, or had, a whole separate life down here. Now, I tell a lot of stories about my old friends and family, adn i think its in part to bring this new life and these new friends into my old life...which will forever be me, no matter how far i try to run. But being here i sa little odd to actually be reminded that there is in fact a separate part of me. It reminds me of when i was at dad's memorial service and realizing for probably teh first time that dad had a whole life that i really know nothing about. He had friends...work buddies but friends all the same... who he had a deep effect on, and who i never really knew or heard about. And I thought that was tremendously weird and (because I wasnt' ready for it...not because its weird for him to have had friends) and a little sad for me that part of dad was a mystery to me. really, so much of dad was a mystery. as predictable as he was...as rote and routine he was... there's so much i dont know.

oops. tangent. gotta split.